A few years ago, two of my sisters and I visited my youngest sister in Thailand. Part of the trip was an unforgettable bicycle tour of a lushly forested part of Bangkok known as the Green Lung.
(I remember the forest vividly, as I did fail to brake properly and crashed off an elevated sidewalk into a horde of fire ants.
But that has nothing to do with this story! Focus, people.)
Our tour stopped by a handful of Buddhist temples. I stood within one, my heart crumpling as I gazed at a decaying Buddha at least twice my height. I was also concurrently being feasted upon by mosquitoes, of which I am a constant magnet. (This was not a good trip for me as far as bugs go.)
Our tour guide, a former Buddhist monk, reminded us with pride that nirvana is achieved by desiring nothing.
I remember this fascinating and dismaying me.
There in the dank humidity, I just wanted to get out of a place where mosquitoes could not ruin my life. I was pretty convinced that was a healthy desire.
Self-preservation, among other desires—to eat, sleep, love on my kids, use the bathroom somewhere other than in public—I’m still convicted this is a good thing.
Yes, like the rest of me, my desires are corrupted by sin. But like the rest of me, they also bear the image of God. It’s part of my life’s work to sort them, dying to one and living to the other.
So if, like me when I was younger, you follow a rough theology of “If I don’t want to do something, it’s probably the thing God wants me to do”—it can be a bad way to try to read God’s mind.
Uncomplicate It: What if connecting with God isn’t as hard as it feels?
It’s one thing I love about Hosanna Wong’s new book, Uncomplicate It: Permission to Enjoy God in Your Unique Way.
Wong asks, “What if your personality, learning style, background, and current season of life weren’t obstacles to overcome, but actually the keys to a deeper, more fulfilling relationship with God?”
She writes, “If you think your personality is a roadblock to God, you might be surprised to discover the God who created you and made you with your personality sees it as a shortcut straight to him.”
Wong asked a thousand people about their roadblocks with God—and discovered six common obstacles:
- Busyness
- Distractions
- Grief
- Shame
- Silence
- Expectations
I can identify with every one of these.
I’m curious. What would your roadblocks to God be—right now? Or just “usually”?
Wong spends a chapter unpacking how each of these obstacles can actually serve as connecting points with God.
Busyness
For example, addressing busyness, she asks,
Why do we think being a good parent or a loving friend is at odds with following God? … How is watching your kids play soccer, helping your parents move, assisting your spouse with a project, nursing the baby at midnight, or being a responsible leader, employee, pastor, or coach not spending time with God?
In Uncomplicate It, Wong concedes that poor organization, saying yes to too many things, and overwhelm are a by-product. But, she argues,
many of us don’t have poor scheduling skills; we have poor theology. We think the things God has given us to be faithful in are somehow at odds to being faithful to him. .… I want to free you from the lie that you have two lives:
- Your God life.
- Your real life.
….Following Jesus well looks like loving people well.
Distraction
Probably like the rest of us whose brains get hopped up by an Insta feed and grocery lists and inboxes bursting at the seams, Wong also speaks to those of us embarrassed by prayers and thoughts resembling a pinball machine.
She insists,
The truth is that God wants to have a conversation with the real you—where you really are and what you’re really thinking about.
My point? I don’t think unfocused prayers are to be dismissed.
….At best, the Holy Spirit is leading your thoughts into something He wants you to invite Him into.
….At worst, it’s your restless mind going multiple places … and still, God wants to go there with you.
….Start from where you are.
Grief and shame
And in raw emotions of loss and deep shame, I love, love that Wong believes “As you wrestle about God, wrestle with God.”
She confronts limitations we don’t have to live with, but which do affect the lens through which we see the world: our wounds. Others’ words, or even our own. What we surround ourselves with. Or what we’ve done, and our own feelings of inadequacy.
What, she asks, are you living with—that Jesus has set you free from?
Your antidote for a bad case of the “shoulds”
What I love: Especially for those of us who’ve grown up in the Church with a hefty load of “shoulds” regarding what our relationship with God should look like, this book can be powerful.
I also feel like this book can show those of us embarrassed or constantly guilty about our spiritual lives not being “enough” might show you that the key to your spiritual handcuffs lies within arms reach. The book unearths your particular “Praise-o-nality”—along with practical supports and rhythms to untangle what’s knotted up.
Plus, Wong’s tone in Uncomplicate It is as warm as if you were both wrapping your fingers around a latte in a café. She makes uncomplicating your spirituality feel intensely doable.
The book wasn’t as deep as I might have craved, and sometimes didn’t seem to explore the counterargument to her premises as extensively as I would find helpful.
But overall, this book is worth the read—and worth passing along to a friend who feels spiritually stuck.
So I’m geared up to give away a free copy of Uncomplicate It!
To be entered in the giveaway, just comment below on this post; I’ll reach out to the winner via email (so hey, when you enter your comment email address, which will not be shown to others, don’t enter that email address for all your Amazon notifications or whatever). Pro tip: If you’re extra excited about this, comment on this same post on my Substack. This increases your own odds (I’m giving away one on that platform, too).
I’ll close the drawing at midnight on Wednesday, April 15, 2026.
Either way: Friends, may you find robust freedom in your intimate relationship with God. Leverage your unique workmanship to feel your way toward him (Ephesians 2:10, Acts 17:27).
Like this post? You might like
All There: Tips on Being Fully, Powerfully Present…with God (FREE PRINTABLE)
“I Don’t Feel Close to God” (with PRINTABLE VERSES)
3 Comments
Cindy Childs-Hager - 2 months ago
This looks like an interesting book! Does its approach work equally well with all religions? I’m thinking of a friend who follows the Catholic faith and tends to get caught up in all the rituals without seeming to have a very personal relationship with God. I’ll look forward to reading it!
Natosha - 2 months ago
I am always curious if being unique and believing in God the way I do has meaning or if there is only certain ways to feel his presence be accepted. I always felt there was no rules, but I know that is my own thoughts. However, it be great to know I am fine to do the things I do and still be blessed as those who use traditional methods.
Mellie - 2 months ago
Thanks for reviewing this book, Janel. What you highlighted really resonates with the undercurrent of my thoughts lately regarding my experiential relationship with Christ. I’m interested!