Maybe you’re in a position right now making it particularly difficult to see why you’re married to him. Or her.
Truth: I didn’t marry the kind of guy I thought I would.
I’m guest posting at Marriage Revolution today. Check it out: Did you marry the wrong person?
![Now You're Speaking My [Love] Language](https://www.janelbreitenstein.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/08/love-languages-text-1.jpg "Now You're Speaking My [Love] Language")
April 20, 2024 at 7:51 pm
Before marriage my husband acted like he was extremely attracted to me sexually. Then he began gas lighting me with excuses and accusations that I’m abnormal. He refuses to get help or to try and please me.
His resentment makes it unhappy for me if he does acquiesce. I have no Biblical grounds for divorce so I’m stuck. To make matters worse I have a high sex drive. I’m asking God to take it away. It keeps coming back and hurts. I have taken supplements to get rid of it. I thought about surgery but am embarrassed to ask for it. Any suggestions?
April 20, 2024 at 10:10 pm
Kim, my heart breaks for you. Sounds like you’re in such a painful, if not hurt and angry, place. Wish we could have a coffee, look each other eyeball-to-eyeball, and I could hear more of your story.
I’m so sorry.
I have a few resources that could help, including this post I wrote for FamilyLife.com: https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/romance-and-sex/what-if-i-want-sex-more-than-my-husband-does/
But I do think ultimately–if I can take the liberty of reading between the lines?–sounds like sex could be the symptom, and perhaps not the root issue. (Is that right?)
At the risk of this sounding the wrong way, I would suggest reaching out to a Christian counselor (I’ve been in counseling for years now, and I’m not ashamed to recommend it). Even if your husband would refuse to go with you, I do think you might find some valuable help for you to cope with what sounds like a frustrating situation where I’m getting the vibe you feel a little trapped (from your desire toward divorce).
I write this with trepidation, not knowing enough about you or your situation to know how this will hit you. But know that I feel a great deal of compassion for you, Kim, and that I’m praying for you right now.